You never know when your time on this earth is over. It can happen so fast. It's so cliché, but it's so true. The recent loss of a friend has reminded me of this. Living every day like it's your last is really something we all should be doing. Loving people is the most important part of that - it is the key to a happy life.
Felipe was a perfect example of how we all should be. Genuinely nice, loving, compassionate & always helpful. No matter what social group you may have thought you belonged to, Felipe didn't care. In his eyes, there were only people who he loved. That's it - not people he loved & people he sort of liked & people he wished would go away. No, simply people he loved.
Felipe always had a smile. The first memory that comes to mind for most of us is his beautiful & infectious smile. Felipe smiled because of the love he had for every person that knew him. He always had a smile because he had it figured out - we are here on this earth to love people. I don't know how he did it, but he made it look so effortless.
I know many of us are questioning why the Lord had to take him so early. I have no idea why the Lord has taken this husband, father & friend. But maybe, just maybe if we all live life a little more like Felipe - if we genuinely love all people a little bit more - his death will not be in vain.
8.27.2011
1.05.2011
It's been way too long....
Well, it's been a really long time since I last posted. In fact, the only reason I am posting today is because of how long it has been. I don't really have anything to say...
Let's see, it is January 2011. I am waiting the arrival of my little girl...she's due in less than two weeks & honestly, I hope she shows up before that! I am so done with being pregnant! My son is now 3 and he keeps me busy. He continues to surprise me with how smart he is...I know all parents probably feel that way, but seriously, it's crazy what he comes up with sometimes!?
Someone asked me if I had any New Year's Resolutions...well, I don't usually set any - I figure what's the point?! But after thinking about it a little, if I had to choose just one thing to do differently, it would be to lower my expectations of others. In other words, don't have any expectations of others. In my experience, having expectations just leads to frustration & disappointment. So I'm hoping this year I will experience less frustration & disappointment. :)
Well, until the next post....
Let's see, it is January 2011. I am waiting the arrival of my little girl...she's due in less than two weeks & honestly, I hope she shows up before that! I am so done with being pregnant! My son is now 3 and he keeps me busy. He continues to surprise me with how smart he is...I know all parents probably feel that way, but seriously, it's crazy what he comes up with sometimes!?
Someone asked me if I had any New Year's Resolutions...well, I don't usually set any - I figure what's the point?! But after thinking about it a little, if I had to choose just one thing to do differently, it would be to lower my expectations of others. In other words, don't have any expectations of others. In my experience, having expectations just leads to frustration & disappointment. So I'm hoping this year I will experience less frustration & disappointment. :)
Well, until the next post....
7.12.2010
Is it really that hard to be a grown up?
If you've read a few of my blog posts, you probably know I am easily bothered by others. I don't really let others get me down or really effect my daily life, however, I am often baffled by how others act. I often question why people do the things they do. Recently, I have been wondering why there are so many adults that still act like teenagers? Now if you are a teenager, don't take offense to that last remark. In fact, if you are reading this and you're a teenager, you are probably more mature than the adults I'm referring to.
Why are there so many adults who enjoy getting involved in drama? Why are there so many adults who help to create drama? Why are there so many adults who don't try to diffuse drama among others, but instead they fuel it or even instigate it? Are these adults aware of the ugly mess they are helping to create? Are these adults stuck in jr. high?
I really just don't know how to handle people that claim to be an adult, or rather, their age says they are, but instead they act like a two-faced, drama-filled high school student. (Again, if you are a high school student, you probably aren't two-faced or drama-filled, but I bet you know someone who is.) Is it really that hard to be the adult? Is it really that hard to act like a grown up? Seriously, is it???
Why are there so many adults who enjoy getting involved in drama? Why are there so many adults who help to create drama? Why are there so many adults who don't try to diffuse drama among others, but instead they fuel it or even instigate it? Are these adults aware of the ugly mess they are helping to create? Are these adults stuck in jr. high?
I really just don't know how to handle people that claim to be an adult, or rather, their age says they are, but instead they act like a two-faced, drama-filled high school student. (Again, if you are a high school student, you probably aren't two-faced or drama-filled, but I bet you know someone who is.) Is it really that hard to be the adult? Is it really that hard to act like a grown up? Seriously, is it???
6.28.2010
Family & friends keep me feeling connected...
It's been awhile since I decided to actually write something on here. I guess I've just been busy with life. I found out I am expecting another child & I've been battling so-called "morning sickness" ever since. I have been thinking a lot about family, friends & so-called friends. That's where this post is coming from...my latest thoughts.
I am lucky to have family that is there for me. Regardless of what we are going through or how our opinions might differ, we are there for each other. That's how family is supposed to be, however there are many out there that aren't blessed with a family who loves them unconditionally. For those people, I am very sorry.
That's where friends come in...friends are also supposed to be there for you, no matter what. Friends are supposed to love you unconditionally. Friends like this are like family. There is a connection there - a bond, which is close to that bond you have with your family. Friends like these don't come around very often in life. These friends could move away, and yet when you see them, it's as if you have seen one another every day for years. Friends like this are important.
Then there are so-called friends. People who call you their friend, but aren't necessarily there for you. They are there to see how you can benefit them. They do not love you unconditionally. They will act one way when you are around & then when you aren't there, they may even talk bad about you. They will try to connect with you, if you have something they need or want. The connection with them isn't healthy. In fact, I find it to be destructive. I say, be weary of these friends.
For now, I think I'm done with my rant. I just want to say I am so thankful for a family who will always be there....and there are a lot of them! I am also very thankful that I have a few friends that I will be connected to forever.
I am lucky to have family that is there for me. Regardless of what we are going through or how our opinions might differ, we are there for each other. That's how family is supposed to be, however there are many out there that aren't blessed with a family who loves them unconditionally. For those people, I am very sorry.
That's where friends come in...friends are also supposed to be there for you, no matter what. Friends are supposed to love you unconditionally. Friends like this are like family. There is a connection there - a bond, which is close to that bond you have with your family. Friends like these don't come around very often in life. These friends could move away, and yet when you see them, it's as if you have seen one another every day for years. Friends like this are important.
Then there are so-called friends. People who call you their friend, but aren't necessarily there for you. They are there to see how you can benefit them. They do not love you unconditionally. They will act one way when you are around & then when you aren't there, they may even talk bad about you. They will try to connect with you, if you have something they need or want. The connection with them isn't healthy. In fact, I find it to be destructive. I say, be weary of these friends.
For now, I think I'm done with my rant. I just want to say I am so thankful for a family who will always be there....and there are a lot of them! I am also very thankful that I have a few friends that I will be connected to forever.
5.03.2010
Going deeper....
Is it rare to want to go deeper? To want to really get to know other people on a deeper level? To get past the superficial surface relationships & delve into real, personal, honest relationships? If it isn't rare to have the desire, why is it so rare to find other people willing to get real & go deep?
I believe that our life experiences help to form the person we are at any given point in our life. Experiences from our childhood & teenage years are especially formative. I also believe that experiences we saw our parents, or other loved ones go through have an effect on how we relate to others. These previous experiences are generally the reasons why people don't go deeper in most of their relationships; trusting people or letting them "get in" could be illogical. What I mean is, maybe a previous experience, either one of their own or one they saw someone go through, is holding them back from genuinely trusting people. The question then is, how do we reshape our thoughts to allow for more trust in people?
I'm always saying I want people to be real. I'm always longing for deeper relationships with people. I'm always expecting people to let go of the superficial and get real. But am I really ready to do that myself? I haven't experienced any real hurt that would lead to a lack of trust in others, but unfortunately, I have seen deep hurt up close and personal in lives of loved ones. The hurt I saw as a young teenager has created a fear inside of me. I'm afraid to get too close to any one person, for fear they will hurt me. Now there are a few exceptions in my life, my family, my husband, and one friend. There are a couple of friends that are close, but not too close. And still others who may think of me as a close friend, but in my mind, they are more like acquaintances.
Some might say, "Well, you are lucky you have just one good friend in your life." But honestly, isn't life all about relationships? As Christians, shouldn't we long to get past the superficial with other Christians? Why is it I feel like most of my superficial relationships are in Christians circles? Others may say, "Well you can't be best friends with everyone!" To that I say, you're right, but I think most people say that because they don't want to let down their walls either. I believe that statement to be an excuse for people, a sort of justification of their own behaviors.
I don't really know why I'm putting this out into the blogosphere, but I am. I really just wonder how many other people are afraid of getting hurt by someone? I didn't really know that I was, but I must be; I know I don't let people in too easily. Aren't we all just wandering the world, longing for human connections? Aren't we all just longing for deeper relationships?
I believe that our life experiences help to form the person we are at any given point in our life. Experiences from our childhood & teenage years are especially formative. I also believe that experiences we saw our parents, or other loved ones go through have an effect on how we relate to others. These previous experiences are generally the reasons why people don't go deeper in most of their relationships; trusting people or letting them "get in" could be illogical. What I mean is, maybe a previous experience, either one of their own or one they saw someone go through, is holding them back from genuinely trusting people. The question then is, how do we reshape our thoughts to allow for more trust in people?
I'm always saying I want people to be real. I'm always longing for deeper relationships with people. I'm always expecting people to let go of the superficial and get real. But am I really ready to do that myself? I haven't experienced any real hurt that would lead to a lack of trust in others, but unfortunately, I have seen deep hurt up close and personal in lives of loved ones. The hurt I saw as a young teenager has created a fear inside of me. I'm afraid to get too close to any one person, for fear they will hurt me. Now there are a few exceptions in my life, my family, my husband, and one friend. There are a couple of friends that are close, but not too close. And still others who may think of me as a close friend, but in my mind, they are more like acquaintances.
Some might say, "Well, you are lucky you have just one good friend in your life." But honestly, isn't life all about relationships? As Christians, shouldn't we long to get past the superficial with other Christians? Why is it I feel like most of my superficial relationships are in Christians circles? Others may say, "Well you can't be best friends with everyone!" To that I say, you're right, but I think most people say that because they don't want to let down their walls either. I believe that statement to be an excuse for people, a sort of justification of their own behaviors.
I don't really know why I'm putting this out into the blogosphere, but I am. I really just wonder how many other people are afraid of getting hurt by someone? I didn't really know that I was, but I must be; I know I don't let people in too easily. Aren't we all just wandering the world, longing for human connections? Aren't we all just longing for deeper relationships?
4.15.2010
Never easy...
Today I was reminded that admitting you are wrong does not come natural. This morning while playing out the usual wake up routine in my bed with my son & husband, Aaron reminded me how truly difficult it is to say two simple words, 'I'm sorry.'
The usual morning tickle monster visited the bed & Aaron was doing the typical laugh with glee, but asking the monster to stop tickling. Finally Aaron had really had enough and slapped daddy in the face, although both mommy & daddy were doing the tickling; poor daddy always gets the worst of it. Daddy received a couple of slaps in the face from Aaron. I grabbed Aaron & demanded he tell his daddy he was sorry. Aaron was not having it. He whined & cried & buried his face in the bed. He writhed around trying to avoid the inevitable apology. He was not going to do it. He started to reply to my demands saying, "I'm sorry is the yuckiest thing in the whole life!" Wow! How stubborn can one child be?! Did I really have a 2 year old that thought admitting his wrongs was the worst thing in the world? Had I taught him this by my own actions? Or was this something that was just innate; some feeling every one of us is born with? This was definitely not something Aaron wanted to do. He knew he had done wrong and didn't want to admit to it. He didn't want to say he was sorry because that meant he was admitting he was wrong. After over 15 minutes of pleading, Aaron finally apologized to his daddy.
After reflecting on the event, I was reminded about my own inability to apologize. How often do I swallow my pride and actual apologize for something wrong I know I have done? How often is my first instinct to just writhe around in my discomfort and hope that the feeling of conviction will go away?
The usual morning tickle monster visited the bed & Aaron was doing the typical laugh with glee, but asking the monster to stop tickling. Finally Aaron had really had enough and slapped daddy in the face, although both mommy & daddy were doing the tickling; poor daddy always gets the worst of it. Daddy received a couple of slaps in the face from Aaron. I grabbed Aaron & demanded he tell his daddy he was sorry. Aaron was not having it. He whined & cried & buried his face in the bed. He writhed around trying to avoid the inevitable apology. He was not going to do it. He started to reply to my demands saying, "I'm sorry is the yuckiest thing in the whole life!" Wow! How stubborn can one child be?! Did I really have a 2 year old that thought admitting his wrongs was the worst thing in the world? Had I taught him this by my own actions? Or was this something that was just innate; some feeling every one of us is born with? This was definitely not something Aaron wanted to do. He knew he had done wrong and didn't want to admit to it. He didn't want to say he was sorry because that meant he was admitting he was wrong. After over 15 minutes of pleading, Aaron finally apologized to his daddy.
After reflecting on the event, I was reminded about my own inability to apologize. How often do I swallow my pride and actual apologize for something wrong I know I have done? How often is my first instinct to just writhe around in my discomfort and hope that the feeling of conviction will go away?
3.25.2010
I Wonder...
I wonder. That's it, I wonder. There are so many thoughts that go through my head every day. These thoughts are about everything and anything.
I wonder when I will have time to do all of the "tasks" that need to get done around the house. Things like laundry, dishes and dusting to even more in depth projects like cleaning out the back room, decorating the side room & getting new curtains. I wonder what I will cook for dinner. I wonder if dinner will taste good. I wonder when I will have time to make sure each member of my family feels that I am 100% here for them.
I wonder what my future will hold. I wonder if my husband and I will have another child. I wonder if we will live in California forever. I wonder if our son will go to college or be a rockstar. I wonder if my son will have any children. I wonder if he will get married. I wonder if he will know how much his dad and I love him. I wonder how active I will be when I'm 60.
I wonder if I will ever accomplish my life goals. I have accomplished some, but I wonder if certain dreams I've had since I was a small child will one day become reality. I wonder if I will ever publish a book. I wonder if I will ever become a teacher. I wonder if I will ever make a difference.
I wonder if I will ever stop being annoyed and derailed by people. I wonder if I will ever stop letting peoples attitudes and actions dictate my own. I wonder if I will ever step up and completely and honestly love even the hardest ones to love; the ones who think they know everything or have to do everything and really just end up annoying everyone around them. I wonder if I will ever stop being cynical. I wonder if I will ever change.
I wonder...
I wonder when I will have time to do all of the "tasks" that need to get done around the house. Things like laundry, dishes and dusting to even more in depth projects like cleaning out the back room, decorating the side room & getting new curtains. I wonder what I will cook for dinner. I wonder if dinner will taste good. I wonder when I will have time to make sure each member of my family feels that I am 100% here for them.
I wonder what my future will hold. I wonder if my husband and I will have another child. I wonder if we will live in California forever. I wonder if our son will go to college or be a rockstar. I wonder if my son will have any children. I wonder if he will get married. I wonder if he will know how much his dad and I love him. I wonder how active I will be when I'm 60.
I wonder if I will ever accomplish my life goals. I have accomplished some, but I wonder if certain dreams I've had since I was a small child will one day become reality. I wonder if I will ever publish a book. I wonder if I will ever become a teacher. I wonder if I will ever make a difference.
I wonder if I will ever stop being annoyed and derailed by people. I wonder if I will ever stop letting peoples attitudes and actions dictate my own. I wonder if I will ever step up and completely and honestly love even the hardest ones to love; the ones who think they know everything or have to do everything and really just end up annoying everyone around them. I wonder if I will ever stop being cynical. I wonder if I will ever change.
I wonder...
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)